[Pasco County, FL] I’ve never done a good job of seeing music when I’m traveling
and decided to rectify that on this longer-than-usual trip. After four nights
of immersion in a gaggle of female coworkers & friends for (a beloved gaggle
for sure: WomanInCharge, SouthernSpice, to name a few), this was my first opportunity
to single-mindedly pursue my obsession. I was decidedly moving to New
York through my first three days there. I was decidedly never moving to
New York by my last day there. My legs hurt in places that ought not hurt on an
avid walker/jogger like me. I was cursing every hectic cross-section, every
complicated subway station. I was really disturbed when a Lyft driver told me taxi
drivers are committing suicide at record rates because their jobs are disappearing.
When the graffiti and grit stopped charming me, I knew my body, mind, and
spirit were in dire straits. So I picked this show solely based on its early
time and close location. If I was up for it, Uncle Charlie’s Gay Piano Bar
& Lounge, or even some New York jazz, were much more appealing options… but I wasn’t up for it. I didn’t and don’t
know anything about the history or reputation of the venue but it was overtly rich
theatrical décor, not bad. An inexplicably frazzled hostess ushered the ten of
us who had been waiting in line outside in the bracing cold into an initial waiting
lounge. The bathroom was probably ten miles down in some sub-sub-basement so by
the time I got back we had been released to enter the actual room – more of the
same – dark rich coloring – big showy theatre decor. Food and drink super
expensive and not even close to being tasty. I didn’t know anything about the
band although their name was vaguely familiar. So it turned out this was more a
promotion for the brothers’ release of their autobiography Let Your Love Flow, The Life and Times of The Bellamy Brothers –
that’s what I get for being all haphazard about it. Worse, the woman
interviewing them was from Backstory Events for Parade Magazine. The crowd (of
20, counting the camera men and bizzy media people) reflected this whole state
of affairs. Interviewer was just not dynamic. The crowd was flat, not laughing
at any of the brothers’ quips – because they weren’t all that funny. Plus they
couldn’t finish all their supposedly salacious stories because ‘can’t-ruin-the-book!’
From the riveting interview, I learned that they are largely famous for “Let
Your Love Flow,” which it turns out I know, and, according to them, was famous
with the hippies, churches, and honky tonks. They’ve played with Dolly, Willie,
George. They were wild in their youth—lots of drugs, lived in a basement in LA
with the comedian Gallagher. They have toured internationally extensively. It
got really awkward (for me at least) when they described how they were walking
beaches in Calcedonia and approached by unlikely fisherman fans: I mean they
were cannibals just recently! In more politically-neutral observations of what
they’ve seen: 1) The zoning in India is worse than in Houston Texas!
(personally interesting because I lived in a slummy 70s Houston apartment right
below the glare of a beautiful mansion), 2) The DMZ was intense – the North
Korean soldiers did not like cowboy hats (I amazingly get to go to South Korea
in May! And fortunately, I guess, will not be wearing a cowboy hat). As they,
sort of eloquently put it, they spent a lot of time trying to kill themselves
and now spend a lot of time trying to save themselves, which is played out in
their new reality show on the Cowboy Channel: “Honky Tonk Ranch.” It takes
place in the ranch in Florida where they grew up in and ultimately returned to,
to live together (one’s married). The show is based in ‘ranch humor’ – lots of
pranks. The (2? 3?) audience questions stirred things up a bit… at some point
in the distant past, a University of Florida professor who fancied himself as
Tim Leary released mushroom spores into the air. Those that landed in cow
paddies developed into hallucinogenics. Although the brothers no longer
partake, they said magic mushrooms remain a feature across Floridian ranches.
Ultimately, I found it sort of amazing how close the brothers are after all
these years, living on the same ranch and all – and easily exchanging talking
points. So, to my relief, after the exorbitant amount of money I stupidly paid
for this stupid event, they finally sang. Three songs. 1) “Beautiful Body” –
the song they released as a duet (triet?) with Dolly Parton – “If I said you
had a beautiful body, would you lay it against me” (they were chuckling over
how clever these lyrics are ><), 2) “Let Your Love Flow” – their massive
hit – written by a Neil Diamond roadie they said- they must be so sick of
playing this song, 3) “Redneck Girl” – they were marveling over how two teenage
boys in midtown Manahttan approached them that very same day and not only
recognized them but cited this song as their favorite, I was marveling too. They
said they were influenced by gospel music, Western swing. They sounded super
Jimmy Buffet to me. I liked them. It was like a wall-of-sound, I think mostly
because they were backed by something recorded. But there was an easy laziness
to their sound, almost measured, that was relaxing and I liked how they
harmonized together over their guitars (no one else on stage). And it made
sense that they managed to cross the country hippy boundaries back in the day.
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